The waiting game.
June 2nd, 2016
I hate waiting.
I hate being helpless.
Thus, it probably goes without saying that I hate helplessly waiting.
I'm at the hospital as I write this, essentially subject to the whims of fate as I wait to hear how Brenda's surgery went. I haven't really been talking about that here, because I don't feel that it's within my jurisdiction to tell you all about her business, so I'm not going to say why we're here. But the point is that we are, and I can barely keep still.
Sure, the doctor seems to really know his business, and assures us with more than a little confidence that everything's going to go swimmingly, but it's still hard knowing that the person you care about the most is under the knife. All you can do is wait and see how it goes, really, and this is one of those things that I totally suck at. Holding it together today has been... difficult.
Apparently I've seemed aloof in this regard, but the truth is I've just been trying to be someone that can be leaned on for support when necessary. I imagine it's hard to depend on someone who's melting down in a panic, so I've been doing my best to be the proverbial rock, here. The assumption is that everything will go well, but you know, until I see that is in fact the case, I'll likely be a basket case.